Crisis Again (but fainter...)

 

 

I was almost going to post this on my Instagram story because it resonated with me on some level, or wanted a certain someone to see it to understand, with a slight bend towards coercive social shaming that this is one proud way to live, in fact the trendier one. Maybe I wanted to shame other people too, I don’t know. Or maybe I didn’t want to, I was just considering the implication of doing that. Because that is what it would mean had I shared it to my story. But I didn’t because it did not resonate with me on that level. 

Yes, I do think I am indeed that kind of a rebel. And I am happy to see I am not alone. And I do see other people caged (but who is to say I have no cages?). But I don’t think it is wise to look down upon another person’s experience, even if it might feel like it is spiritually backward. First of all, needing to look down on other people’s life choices and feel extremely snug and proud about your own, in order to feel good, shows a poor source of confidence for your own choices. It is a trauma response. Interestingly enough, going through that stage is a necessity though. For the ego and for forward propulsion out of the injured state. I did go through that stage, I look back now and think. Identifying with the song “I’m an Albatross” exemplifies this avatar. Or archetype, if you’ll call it that. You need to become ‘something’ to handle ‘something’. You could choose either, based on which something you can control. It’s an interesting topic to delve into.

I'm an Albatross:

After realizing how much bucketloads of crap I had put up with because of the 2018 drama in my life (it was very shaming in some way, hard to explain. Kind of like, someone looking at your most vulnerable parts and laughing at them… ), I became dead focussed on ‘sanity’ and ‘normalcy’. I had zero tolerance for bullshit. But honestly, the drama was a blessing in disguise and I knew it on some level even then. I was now a fierce tiger and dealt excellently with any bullshit coming my way. I also got blessed with amazing people who are my best friends even today and my most favorite condo in Tempe. It felt like magic, like God was blessing me. I shed off weight by disconnecting from the old. Any weird stuff coming my way slipped off me like water droplets off a lotus leaf. My fighting spirit intact, I felt invincible. And then the epitome of sanity and normalcy and beauty and harmony, cherry on the cake, was delivered to my doorstep as my roommate who then became my boyfriend.

I held on to this trajectory even through the difficult times that followed. I fought through and achieved heart-warming success because my conviction was strong and my goal seemed closer than ever. I was indulging in it all, perhaps refusing to see when the trajectory had changed and got out of my control. I was after all not as powerful as I thought. I am only human (and everybody else I thought as fools in the past were humans too). And the goal I thought was attainable turned out to be a pipe dream. Thus, it is a thing to have strong convictions and fight for them. It is also a thing to be humble enough to realize some of your convictions may be faulty or erroneous. I guess that’s what we mean when we say we are all searching for the Truth. And then religion has tried to answer this question, and so has capitalism or socialism or any other forms of philosophy. But religion does not give a direct answer and instead has all these twisted messages that one is supposed to interpret and make sense of. Whatever that means, one thing seems clear to me, that the answer is subjective. Otherwise, the answer would be known by now that we have been around for thousands of years. We are all on a journey.

The motive to me seems, is to live your best life. And keep in mind ‘best’ is subjective too. Basically, it means do your best - and that’s so vague, lol, I really love that we have such words which have an exact meaning but are still so unspecific. Anyway, for most part, it means attaining awesome states of mind, living inside a healthy body, enjoying and seeking sensations that Nature has to offer. And the way to do that depends on how we are able to synergize our internal experience with the external. Both of these can be tweaked, and so the confusion arises how to go about it. Honestly, it is a different dimension and we cannot fathom it. But we are able to go one step at a time, and then the integration will cause a movement in this dimension, like the integral of dx in mathematics (lol). The problems that might arise are: someone might pursue ecstasy, or someone might use negative experiences to determine their path (because those are more easy to know clearly). The right thing will just feel right, and you will know it if you let yourself know it.

So, how about the relatively recent 'crisis'? Without the minimal social support I had before I couldn’t be a fighter anymore. It will take a while to figure out what exactly happened with me. But this is not the first time I have experienced a crisis like this. At this point, I just realize there is so much to learn and accept that I don’t yet. I want to get to know myself better - but there’s no saying that that’s something unchanging (gotta find out too about what it is that’s constant). And which aspect is the dragon? And I guess at some point I will have to submit to whatever archetype is taking over me because that would be the next stage of development. Sitting on the fence is not an option (but still required for some time for the sake of healing). This avatar would rise and then it would fall and crash again. And I would still be okay. My previous crisis was guilt, and now my crisis is fear. I just have to carry it with me and caretake it and it will disappear via assimilation. I’ll be fine. I’ll be better than fine.

Selfishness

 I was inspired to resume writing when I recently read an article that reminded me of me - the way I drew analogies from life. I was like, why did I ever stop? Thoughts flit through my mind and are lost without a trace, like a particle-antiparticle pair created from nothing and destroyed unto nothing. Fatigue seems to have caught up with me, years of struggling to just make it over the line. Whatever another may argue, I think it was necessary. There was no other way to get what I want. Such is the world.

I thought I'd start with this topic about selfishness because it is my immediate answer to the article I just read. Although I have never before thought of the world the way the author does, I agree in many ways. I do think there is no universal one size fits all and some people are always going to suffer. Sometimes it's their own fault, sometimes it is not. Well, 'fault' itself is a hard-to-define word. There is no justice in this world, I believe that strongly. So, what is my response? I want to protect my soul in this cold, cold world. I am not saying people are bad, but they are all flawed and destructive, including myself. And most importantly, everybody has very limited knowledge and are making life decisions through games they don't even know they are playing. 'Why' seems to be a long forgotten word.

Given now that I was born into this mad world, I need to find the treasure that is mine, that is hidden, but I can get there. Most people don't even believe they can have a treasure! But sadly, some of them actually don't. Some people are so deep inside the well that they can probably never get out. They say, you can do anything - but that is bullshit. Some people are mentally disabled, they can't do 'anything'. Some people are poor. There are millions of other problems that people suffer from. But life is still worth living if you believe in it. They accept that suffering will always be a part of their life and make peace with it (a relevant religion or philosophy definitely helps). Having thus conquered pain, they set a realistic goal that can make their life better. In this process, they are able to live through the same emotional states another more privileged person is able to live through. Maybe even better. And thus they win at life.

Curled up and Cozy

So, I am back in the world of blogging, hopefully for good. I hope this lasts... or do I? This is the comforting place I go back to when I am not in an actively happy state. But am I sad? I don't think so. I don't know how to describe this state but it is what it is. However, this blog is not about my state. It is about thoughts that come to me. Which usually happens when I am in this state, lol. But I'd like to share this piece of me, for whatever it's worth, to anybody out there, in this world, in this cosmos or beyond. So, hey! Welcome to my blog. :)

PhD.

 

How to keep our Immunity caring about the System

(this article originally appeared on the blog 'Lord of the Flies')

Life is a perpetual struggle, as it should be, forcing thermodynamics to its limit. 

One way to put up the milestones might be your achievements. Or it might even be your failures. Or it might be all the things you let go. Or it might be all the people you have ever loved. Or it might be all those things that you lost. Or it might be all the fairies you have believed in. Or it might even be all the fairies you stopped believing in. Or it might be the behavioral walls you built around yourself, to protect, to become immune. 

We are all born with soft, delicate baby skin, but this world is not a place for that. Our skin hardens and obtains the right complexion and toughness that is required to survive in our environment. It is a natural process. We gather antibodies only after suffering from the disease and surviving. In most cases, isolation is not the solution because if it takes the form of a delayed onset, it harms more than it helps. 

Over time, you become immune to everything. You become immune to bullies at school. You become immune to your parents’ negligence. You become immune to the unavailability of your brother. You become immune to the rude remarks of your sister. You become immune to the selfishness of your friends. You become immune to getting bad grades. You become immune to the prejudices of your professors. You become immune to rebuke by your employer. You become immune to the plight of the beggar on the street. You become immune to the sensitivity of your companion. You become immune to the emotions of your friend. You become immune to the dejected faces of people whom you disappointed. You also become immune to chicken pox and influenza. 

Being so immune is good. No one can hurt you, because no one can reach you. And in the meantime you can coldly play your cards and climb the socioeconomic ladder. 

But as we build this strong fort around ourselves for our protection, it must not become a labyrinth for our souls where we get lost. Yet it often does. The fort becomes more real than its occupant. 

We start by building baby forts. But when we are babies they look really big. We learn to gulp down a few things by getting used to them, or by using some form of "rationality". The highest of all walls we built around our ego, because we know that it has to be protected at all costs, because we know that any harm to it will shatter our confidence to fight, to live and to love. We always protect it, no matter what. 

To counter the risk of another person shattering our confidence, we just HAVE to believe that the person is a fool, and we are sucking up to him/her for OUR benefit and nothing else. But how can you ever respect a person if you have to wear armor whenever you have to face him/her? 

In the desperate attempt to protect ourselves, we shut out the reality we do not want to believe. We refuse to accept our own vulnerability. That might make us feel brave and give us some degree of satisfaction. In fact, it might be a great strategy to buckle up and move on. But to what extent? You lose track... is this person really you, is this really what you wanted? 

People vilify things they once loved because it hurts them to believe otherwise. 

Those battles we had fought in our childhood, fading away like a dream now, look like mere skirmishes. It was easy to stay immune to the world outside your home then, because there was some "apparent" self-sufficiency because your family was taking care of all your needs. Now it’s like you all have been thrown into a pile of candies and you get how much you take. You have to fight and the ugly face of survival appears. This is reality. It can get ugly. 

All the morals, sensitive thinking, reflection -all that held meaning, is just plain lost because you can see that it is not only taking you anywhere but they were empty casks that held nothing at all, no "real" value, nothing to face the reality. They can shade you from the sun for some time, but when you realize that you have got nothing left in spite of being so true to yourself, you realize it was your mistake to believe that people get what they deserve. And seriously, is not that the most illogical thing? Of course, people get what they take - it is so plain and simple. 

It hurts to fight and play dirty games to get something you love, because that is not how you romanticize. You want your lover to stay with you and love you back; you don’t want to have to fight with others to keep him/her. And so it goes with any work that you love, because you think it is yours. That is why competition hurts. Because you have to ‘prove’ that you are good- all the time. And you have to fight, even with those people who do not even "love" that work but they just want to be there for the bucks. And then you realize they are not even wrong. That is how things are and that is how they will always be. 

When you were out of the system, you never cared about it, so you never criticized the system, because there was nothing wrong with it and it seemed good, it is just that YOU were not interested. But then you were forced to fight for your living. So you stepped in and you immediately started getting scathed. Although you played by the rules, you started seeing the imperfections and the loopholes and you started feeling disgusted and hating the system like never before. Maybe, you have to become mean. You do not mind acting mean but it is so much effort! But what if you really become mean? The fort you have built has become you then, and you have lost your identity. 

But you should be more afraid of the fort than the reality around it. By building the fort you have made yourself even more vulnerable that something outside you can just get inside and change you! 

To prevent this, there should be something in your life that brings out your hidden softness. Some constant light that will always provide warmth and keep burning even in the coldest, windiest night. Something that will never let you forget who you are and why you are doing whatever you are doing, that will always show you the direction and whisper- keep going, I am here right next to you. Of course, its mere faith, faith in a person, faith in a process, faith in a deity, but faith is important. We must not become immune to this light. We must make ourselves vulnerable to it and let it tear us apart if it will. It is a gamble you cannot escape. 

There must be some way to find this light. Or is time the only answer? We should not mind as long as there is one. 

 

Opposites Attract!

(this article originally appeared on the blog 'Lord of the Flies')

 

Have you ever wondered why there are two genders: Male and Female? 

There could have been only one, and everyone could have just passed on their genes directly to the next generation; things would have been much simpler. Or there could have been three, with the same kind of forces playing between them in pairs, as in between male and female. Or there could have been four, or five, and so on. 

Yet there are only two sexes in all animals. Even plants. Even bacteria! Why did nature choose only two? What’s up with the number two? 

This question has baffled me for many years. And other than the existence of some mysterious symmetry I could never find any explanation for this. 

And so the question remained for many years, the continuum of confusion broken somewhere by a sudden insight into knowledge in the middle of some dream, which faded away in the morning and I collapsed back into confusion. I knew I had the answer, I just was not able to find it. 

Since this is a biological question, it is more likely to be answered by the theory of Evolution. All biological beings have evolved to the present state because the present state has offered them some advantage in terms of growth, survival and competition. But what is the advantage of having two genders? 

Could it be genetic mixing? Genetic mixing is very useful for evolution, since it creates new kinds of gene combinations that can be tested to perform under the changing conditions.  But genetic mixing could have happened even if there were three genders. That is true. However, if the process of reproduction would have required three people, the probability of three willing candidates coming together would have fallen rapidly, therefore reducing the growth rate. But what if the process required only two, but these pairs could be formed in three ways? That sounds pretty logical... 

The problem here is that reproduction is actually quite big a deal, it consists of so many complex processes like pass on the information, make the child and keep him somewhere safe while you do that, take care of the baby’s health and nourishment, help him/her to grow and learn, and many other cares. A single person can do all this, but then there would be no genetic mixing, in which case if this person does not have the faculty to, we could say, survive a storm, both the person and his baby would die. So what we need here is some sort of collaboration with another person who has that faculty to survive the storm. That person who can survive the storm would also be willing to collaborate with this person because he/she might have got some other quality like, say, survive the heat. By sharing their qualities, they can potentially create a baby that can survive both the storm as well as the heat. It is possible that the future would consist of only the storm, or only the heat, but since you do not know the future, you have to gamble. That is how mating arose. 

In that case there could be just one gender and people could mate with whomever they chose. However, if you have to gamble anyway, collaborating on just one issue is not a very good gamble. There got to be a handful of them, and since both of you are now investing in one project, the responsibility is fairly shared between the two of you. Sharing could have occurred by both of you taking turns to perform the same function, but it could also be that one person performs some of the function and the other does the others. The latter will increase the efficiency of the functions being performed because each of you will then acquire some degree of specialization in the functions you chose to perform, although it will make the gamble riskier. Millions of years ago, on the unstable, unpredictable Earth, the efficiency became the important factor since there were so many gambles anyway. 

In the course of time, this specialization increased to the extent of becoming encoded by the genes! All the complex physiological and psychological differences between male and female boils down to the asymmetric twenty-third pair of chromosome: the XX for female and XY for male. 

And thus arose the two genders. 

Polygamy or Polyandry could have probably arisen whenever one person of a particular gender could increase his/her efficiency multiple times and so could provide for multiple partners of the opposite gender. 

The problem with having three genders in which any two can form pairs is that it cannot happen for reasons of complementarity. If you have to form a pair anyway, you will have to share the chores equally, in which case having a third gender is not at all required. And if the chores were shared equally between three, any two forming a couple could never be capable of providing complete care. In that case collaboration between three persons will be required, which is first of all, as I have said earlier, difficult to attain (the probability of compatible three meeting each other would be so low), and then also difficult to sustain given the number of opposing views that will increase the fighting! 

According to scientists, all of this can be represented in terms of energy costs, although research is still on. 

So two it is, till date. And they continue to fight the temptations that biology conferred upon them to keep their genes afloat. But with the Earth’s changing geography, and the changing society, and the millions of years our sun will continue to burn, who knows the future? 

 

Resurrecting Paradise

(this article originally appeared on the blog 'Lord of the Flies')

"Gar firdaus ae baruhe zamin ast, hamin astu hamin astu hamin ast... "

These famous Urdu words uttered by a Mughal Emperor (most probably Jehangir) aptly captured the beauty of Kashmir once upon a time. The translation would be: If there is paradise on Earth it is here, it is here, it is here. 

 

In this beautiful valley, amidst the splendor of snow-capped mountains, somewhere among the lush green fields the breezes still blow. The peaceful waters of the Jhelum river still scintillate rapturously under the benevolent sun, seeming to have lost all bloody memories of the past, ignorant of the sound of gunshots in the distance. The smiles of its people having faded away, the grandeurs of nature bestowed upon this war-torn land and the many beautiful gardens constructed here by mankind seem like a mockery of its fate- the fate of this ‘paradise’. 

Kashmir has recently been in the news once again for the wrong reasons: ceasefire violations by Pakistan. 

Sixty-six years have passed since the first conflict began, and Time has twisted together the myths and the facts so capriciously that it seems almost impossible to disentangle them today. 

Sixty-six years ago, the Indian subcontinent became independent from the British rule, and two nations were formed: India and Pakistan (later on, former East Pakistan separated from Pakistan as Bangladesh). And ever since then, India and Pakistan have been fighting over Kashmir. 

I am from India and, until now, I used to hate Pakistan for this. 

What I knew was that when the British were leaving India, some Muslims started demanding for a separate nation exclusively for Muslims, perhaps insecure of being dominated by an overwhelming Hindu majority, probably also fearing vengeance given that most Mughal rulers, with the exception of Akbar and a few others, were not particularly kind to the Hindus. What they could not see is that the two-hundred-year-old past was long forgotten ever since the Hindus and Muslims came together and embraced each other, united to fight against the oppressive British rule. Another reason was perhaps that India aspired to be a secular democratic, and ‘secularism’ was not something the orthodox Muslims were very fond of. Also, it would have been highly unlikely that the founder of Pakistan, Muhammad Ali Jinnah, would let go such a great shot at power. 

It was a deadlock that was difficult to resolve, since all Hindus and some Muslims did not want this separation. But the British couldn’t leave India till a consensus was reached on this matter. They alternatively proposed that all the states having a Muslim majority be allowed to constitute Pakistan, and this became the demand of Jinnah and the Muslim League, as opposed to the Indian National Congress. When there arose talks about an interim government constituting both the parties, the Muslim League felt threatened and launched the 'Direct Action Day' in Calcutta, which turned into a campaign of violent aggression and worst kind of Massacre, killing around 5000 people. Muhammad Ali Jinnah said: 

Why do you expect me alone to sit with folded hands? I also am going to make trouble. 

The Indian leaders were desperate for Independence (probably also for power?), and everyone was tired of the 200-year long fighting. It was also heartbreaking in general to see the people who once fought together on the battlefield now kill each other. The only solution was: Pakistan. 

And so Pakistan was formed. East Pakistan and West Pakistan, on the two sides of India. Few years hence, East Pakistan would separate from Pakistan to form an Independent nation called Bangladesh, owing to differences arising from language, culture, ethnicity and many other factors. (India had helped Bangladesh in this war, which is infamous for the Pakistani war crimes that are often compared to those that happened during World War II, giving Pakistan another reason to hate India.) 

 

Even after the partition was given a thumbs-up, terrible violence followed, leading to the worst kind of riots India has ever seen. Nobody seems to know the real reasons. It could have been the result of a cycle of rebuttals. Also, when it was agreed that states with a Muslim majority would go to Pakistan, some people in these Muslim-majority states took it upon them to ‘create’ this majority by destroying the minority as far as they could, because the majority-minority ratios were usually like 60-40. Since in those days there were no proper information channels, and radio was a luxury of the rich, there could be many rumors being propagated and people reacting to them with blind emotions. Amidst the confusion and lawlessness no one really knew for sure where Pakistan ended and India began. It took months to contain this violence, which killed millions of people. The horrors echo to this day. 

In such a way, British India was divided. However, there were some parts of India which were not exactly under the British: these were known as the ‘Princely States’, and they stayed mostly independent of the British rule in return for huge sums of money. These states were granted the freedom to choose whether to join India, or Pakistan, or stay independent. These Princely States included some Muslim-dominated states with a Hindu ruler, and some Hindu-dominated states with a Muslim ruler. Although they had been given a ‘choice’, it was not exactly their choice because there was a lot of pressure from the local people. In all cases, except Kashmir, the religious dominance, and sometimes even the location, determined the fate of the state. 

Kashmir, however, was different. Located on the India-Pakistan border, it was a Muslim-dominated state with a Hindu King, who chose to remain with India. This was not acceptable to Pakistan, and they have always wanted Kashmir ever since. They have also attacked and occupied a part of Kashmir. 

Pakistan looks at India as a Hindu country, while the truth is that India has more Muslims than the entire population of Pakistan! 

Today, the people of Kashmir, as citizens of India, participate in the general elections and state elections in considerable numbers. I take that as an expression of solidarity with India. The Ministry of Kashmir majorly comprises of Muslims, accurately representing their population, and they all see themselves as Indians. Lot of people from Kashmir are going to different parts of the country for higher education, or for jobs, or settling down in inter-religious/inter-caste marriages, it does not matter: the views of the educated generation resonates with the ideas of a ‘secular democracy’. That includes a lot of people I personally know. 

I have always condemned Pakistan for wanting something that does not belong to them, wanting to force themselves on people who do not want them. And it is not just Kashmir. India has suffered many 9/11’s in the hands of Pakistani terrorists, many bomb-blasts. I can understand if some people in a country turn out to be bad, what I cannot understand is how all the people in a country can harbor so much hatred for their neighbor. No, Pakistan does not feel sorry for the people they have killed in India. In fact, if they do, they get killed. Pakistani attacks are also threatening the Indian democracy in a way that ‘Islamophobia’ is increasing in the country, and our own Muslims are being segregated against, looked upon with suspicion. 

I have always hoped that one day I wake up to see that there is no Pakistan in the world map. 

Meeting Pakistani delegates in a school-fest did not help. Becoming a fan of Pakistani musicians who made it big in Bollywood did not help. Reading Khushwant Singh’s accounts of a high society, where the ultra-rich Indians and Pakistanis apparently had no differences, did not help. The marriage of the Indian tennis star Sania Mirza to the Pakistani cricketer Shoaib Malik did not help. 

It is like, "fine, they are also normal people, like us". But how can we proceed from here unless the major issue is resolved? A part of Kashmir still remains with Pakistan, and the people of Pakistan still believe that Kashmir is theirs. In fact, Kashmir used to be one of their election issues before they stopped having elections and sank into this cycle of alternating democracy and dictatorship. Kashmir, of course, remains their foremost issue. And in spite of what the whole world can see, how can they still believe that they have got a better economy than ours? Why do they mistake the soft corner Indian Muslims might understandably have for them as some sort of support? The strong Muslim cast of a recent Bollywood movie, D-Day, which deals with a wishful Indian operation in Pakistan in search of a most-wanted terrorist, sends out a message. And I guess Pakistan got it when they banned the movie in their country. 

Today, India and Pakistan are trying to be friends, without referring to the Kashmir issue. Now, how does one put all this unsettled business behind and set about to make friends? One of my friends has a Pakistani pen friend but I cannot understand that. If I did that, I would be faking, as I am sure many people are. 

Yet something unexpected made me look in the other direction. 

The Indian Media is on a high note these days, and recently NDTV succeeded in inviting Pakistani professors to a Panel debating the Kashmir issue. And the professors were quite cool, I really liked them! In the course of the discussions I came to know the root of the conflict, which was much more subtle than I used to think. During the partition, the ruler of Kashmir actually wanted independence, probably due to greed for power. This was not acceptable to anyone and it was decided that a poll would be conducted in order to decide whether Kashmir goes to India or Pakistan. But that poll never happened. Pakistan attacked Kashmir before that, in an attempt to overthrow the King, and this propelled the King to react by pledging allegiance to India. Immediately, Indian troops were sent to defend Kashmir. The Indian troops had managed to secure about two-thirds of Kashmir when the United Nations ordered a cease-fire. Since then, one-third of Kashmir remains with Pakistan, and the dispute continues. (China has also got a chunk of Kashmir, but that is another story.) 

Pakistan realizes that it was a great strategic mistake to attack Kashmir. Some Pakistanis even deny that the invasion happened with the knowledge and support of the State. Some Pakistanis also argues that the King of Kashmir had sought India’s help during the attack but that did not mean he wanted to join India. 

Along with this, Pakistan highlights the atrocities committed by Hindus on Muslims in Kashmir during the riots while India highlights the reverse. The scenes of trains full of slaughtered people arriving at the stations, in both the countries, have not been forgotten. Under such circumstances, it is natural for people on both sides to hate each other, especially so when they are introduced to the partial knowledge at a young age. 

Could a reality check at a younger age help? Two years ago, three young Pakistanis set out on a mission to create a History textbook that presented the History taught in Indian schools and those taught in Pakistani schools side-by-side. The two Histories are apparently quite different. I am quite jealous that this awesome idea should come from Pakistan. Although still waiting for widespread acceptance, and probably some more painstaking research, with this venture they not only created history but also won my heart. 

And so did this photograph: 

 

 A Kashmiri farmer crosses a barbed wire fence to check his crop on a foggy 

morning on the outskirts of Srinagar, India (AP Photo/Dar Yasin) 

Here is a common farmer from Kashmir, who is living his routine life, earning his daily bread, oblivious and indifferent to the big deal people are making about his land. In the fight between two nations we have perhaps forgotten the people of Kashmir. What do they want? Will it be fair to conduct a poll now given that a lot of Kashmiris are still in refugee camps in the adjacent states, too afraid to return? Or should we just forget the past and accept the Line-of-Control as the National Border? Does Pakistan want to keep the dispute alive as an election issue? There is no consensus. It could be an issue that is being strategically kept alive so that it could be used to advantage at an opportune time, by China or the United States. 

Many people think that the first step towards resolving the Kashmir issue is friendship. Friendship on a personal level could produce something fruitful after a few generations, but at the moment that kind of thing is more tangential to the current problem. As education in Pakistan is improving, a lot of people are coming out of the cocoon, becoming more aware and doing good work, and also extending a friendly hand towards India, so there is some hope. Friendship on a National level though is very tricky, given that Pakistan has breached treaties it signed with India in the past. The political climate in Pakistan remains unstable, cross-border terrorism continues, and until this stops I don’t think we can proceed towards peaceful negotiations. 

Omar Abdullah, the Chief Minister of Kashmir recently said: 

"Thinking that the relations will get normalized in such a situation, that is impossible. We will surely talk, but the results that we want out of that dialogue, we cannot achieve those till such things (infiltration and ceasefire violations) are not stopped. "

And I agree with him.